Birthday Blues

Three days ago it was my half-birthday... in honor of the event, I looked into my birthdate.
People Born on December 27th :
Of slight build (5'9" slight???)
lots of charm (No comment)
appeal and attraction (Well, my mommy likes me)
pleasant aura
flirtatious
adventurous
sensitive (Very true. I bruise easily)
always in love
wants to love and be loved (Who doesn't?)
faithful and tender partner
very generous
scientific talents (Yeah, that's why I majored in communication)
lives for today
a carefree philosopher with imagination (I had a lot of imaginary friends as a child. does that count?)

What does your birthday say about you? Check here and find out.

Attention Cardinals Fans:

Cory has installed a new "service" for you on his blog: The Albert Pujols Watch. Check in daily to see where Albert stands in the race for baseball's "Triple Crown."

A Legend Passes

Katharine Hepburn died today.

One of the weird things about working at a television station is that you know stuff like this before anyone else... suddenly you'll notice a lot of video of somebody on the feeds, then the "urgent" bulletin comes across the AP wire. The networks always seem to know before the AP reports it. In fact, ABC did a five-minute report on Katharine Hepburn before the AP reported anything today.

At my last station, our main anchor, John Garlock (aka "Johnny G-Funk"), used to always beg me to do my Katherine Hepburn impersonation. The raunchier the phrase I'd say in her voice, the better. I have to admit, it's pretty good, even though it's really an impression of Martin Short doing an impression of Katharine Hepburn. I may have to retire out of respect for Ms. Hepburn. I'm sure John will be brokenhearted.

As for Katharine herself, I think I may have to rent "The Lion In Winter" as a little tribute this week. You just can't beat her performance as Eleanor of Aquitaine (though she tied with Barbra Streisand for the Oscar that year).

Group Interaction

I've decided that this blog needs some more group interaction. So I've resorted to the Friday Five. Of course, this week, I'm a couple of days late.

Every week, I'll post the "Friday Five," and tell you my answers. In return, I'd appreciate if it you leave your answers in the comments area.

1. How are you planning to spend the summer? Work, work, work. I get several weeks off this summer, so next week I'm going home for a short visit. I'm hoping some friends will come down here for a few days, but we'll see.
2. What was your first summer job? Ahhhhh, the Spartan Motel, Rochester's cheapest overnight lodging. A girl named Dana something-or-other got me a job there. We had a blast, though the place was seriously scary. Found lots of sex toys, gay porn and beer bottles. The beer bottles weren't so bad, since we'd return them for the deposit and usually clear about $60 between the five of us on a weekend. Oh... and the motel sponsored a youth baseball team... the "Quickies." Honest to God. I used to have a ton of pens that had "Quickies Sponsored By Spartan Motel" printed on the side.
3. If you could go anywhere this summer, where would you go? I'd really love to take Cory to New York City. I've been there a couple of times, and he's never been there.
4. What was your worst vacation ever? About 14 years ago, my grandmother was sick, and my mom and I went out to Massachusetts to see her. Our air mattress had a leak, it smelled like something died in her dirt cellar, and that was just the start of the fun. Jan and I saw a documentary on Woodstock, and they had a tent for people having "bad trips." We decided we'd definitely qualify... even if it was a different kind of "trip."
5. What was your best vacation ever? Las Vegas. Rich and I went, maybe five years ago. The only crummy part was that we stayed at "Circus Circus," and I'm creeped out by clowns.

Ok... It's your turn now!

Overhaul

Today, I watched a tape of myself for the first time in a quite a while, and let me say, it was pretty eye-opening.

I used to get the opportunity to watch myself more often. Until about six months ago, the station re-broadcasted our 11pm newscast at 1am, so I'd flip over while I was watching Conan O'Brien and check out my show.

Today, I hauled out some tapes from the last few weeks that were lying around in the newsroom. Initial observations from the world's most vain girl:
1) My hair is waaaaay too light. I keep getting lowlights put in to make it darker, but I spend so much time outside shooting baseball games that the sun lightens my hair and I'm back to square one. The lights on the set also make it look lighter than it actually is.
2) My hair is also waaaaay too long. As many of you know, I've been trying to grow it out. Currently, though, I look like a big fuzzball. Not cool.
3) For some reason, my lips look nonexistant. Once again, the lights on the set kind of wash me out. I already wear very dark lipstick, but apparently I need to go darker.
4) I squint a lot. Of course, I've been waiting nearly three weeks to get my new contacts, so I blame Eyeglass World for that one.

I think it's time for an overhaul.

Feeling Mysterious

As I mentioned in my post from Saturday (6/21), I really enjoy mystery novels. Tonight, I had a total flashback to my childhood. Cory and I were watching "About Schmidt, " and Jack Nicholson was lying in bed in his son-in-law's childhood bedroom, reading a kid's book. I recognized the cover the second I saw it, because I had the exact same book. It was an "Encyclopedia Brown" book.

Tell me, could little nerds-in-training possible have a better role model than 'Ol Encyclopedia Brown? I didn't think so.

Ouch!

Strange things are happening in Kingman, Arizona.
Don't you think someone would have noticed if it was missing?

World Tour '03

Tonight I was too lazy to make dinner. Usually, on my nights off, I cook dinner so that Cory and I don't waste as much money eating out. But tonight I was still a little tuckered out by my recent digestive coup, so we headed out on the town during Cory's dinner break.

We ended up eating at B.Merrill's, sort of a bar/restaurant. For the last year or so, their "World Beer Tour" has intrigued me. Tonight, I started the tour with beer #56, Moosehead. It made me think, the last time I had a Moosehead Lager, I was 22 years old and my friend Sue bought me a 6-pack of Moosehead and six really nice beer mugs for my college graduation.

So, the world beer tour has begun. There are 160 beers on the list, though I think after about 30 of them, I get a free mug. To be honest, I don't see it happening.

Shoe Update

So I bought the damn shoes. Damn you, Payless, and your reasonably-priced silver shoes!

If the Shoe Fits...

Ugh. So I mentioned yesterday that I went on a brief shoe-shopping excursion. It was pretty short-lived, since my digestive system was still staging its coup (we're currently in a cease-fire).

The excursion didn't go well. See, I need open-toed silver shoes, and I don't know any strippers to guide me in the right direction (ha ha). Actually, they're for my friend Crackhouse Nicki's wedding. Silver shoes, sure, I can handle that. But to put a restriction on it like "open-toed silver shoes," well, that's another story altogether.

I should add here that there's some urgency to the shoe-shopping. Since the wedding's in Michigan and I'm not, I have to get fitted for the dress on my upcoming trip to the Great Lakes State. In order to get the length right, I have to be wearing the shoes. That means the shoes have to be in my posession by 8am Wednesday (and today is my last day off before I leave town).

So today, I bit the bullet and went to the mall, and believe it or not, I found a pair of cute strappy silver dress shoes at Payless Shoe Source... and they're only $12.99... and they fit my freak-sized feet.

Then it dawns on me. Do I really want to wear strappy sandals (or for that matter, open-toed shoes at all) in Michigan in September? This is the decision I've been pondering for the last several hours. On the one hand, my feet could freeze. On the other hand, when am I ever going to find a pair of size 9 1/2 open-toed silver shoes for less than 13 bucks? Seriously.

Warning: Politically Incorrect Post Follows

Ok, I'm not normally one to mock people of other cultures (At least, I wouldn't mock because they're from another culture. But I don't care what country you're from... if you have toilet paper hanging from your shoe, I'm not passing that up.... but I digress.)

As we all know, English is a bitch of a language. The rules make no sense, the sentence structure is difficult to learn, and we Americans have slaughtered it to the point of no return. However, it's pretty funny when people butcher it. In particular, this one is a favorite of mine.

Attack of the Killer 'Hoppers

Does anyone else fear those enormous black grasshoppers? The ones I have on my patio are about three times the size of a normal grasshopper (maybe 3 1/2 inches long), and they're black with yellow stripes and tiny little wings on their backs.

Tonight, I was about to grill some chicken on the patio, I opened the back door and there was one right at eye level on the outside of the door. I screamed bloody murder and slammed the door as hard as I could, hoping the force would knock him off the door. I finally went out the front door, walked all the way around the building to my patio, went in through the gate and spotted him on the ground right outside the door. Creeped me out, so I went back around the front to go back in the apartment.

Later, I tried to get him away from the door using a patio shoe, but when I gave him a little shove with it, he fluttered his little wings at me. Scared the crap out of me.

Then Cory came home, and I told him "There's a scary grasshopper on the patio, I'm scared to go out there." I think he was kind of laughing about that, but then he went out there and I heard him say "Holy S**t, that's the biggest F***ing Grasshopper I've ever seen. He was afraid to touch it, too. Eventually, he shooed him away using a broom.

I Be Illin'

Ok, I've narrowed it down: Either I have food poisoning (again) or my digestive system is attempting to stage a coup. Either way, it's not good.

Why is it that I only get sick on my days off? What kind of cruel twist of fate is that? The last time I got food poisoning was December 28th, and we were planning on a three-day vacation to Panama City (or as I like to call it, the "Redneck Riviera"). Oh, we went. But it wasn't much fun... especially the drive down.

Actually, sometimes I get sick when it isn't my day off. Of course, when that happens, Dave's usually on vacation, so I can't take any time off for a full week. Two Christmases ago, I got the flu four days before Christmas and my boss was taking time off. Since we're a two-person department, it's pretty difficult for us both to take the same day off. So, I brought in a blanket, did as much work as I could stomach, then curled up on the sofa in the lobby until it was time to go on the air. It was not pretty.

I do feel a little bit better than I did this morning. I got out of the house, bought some ginger ale and 'nilla wafers, and scarfed them down. So the nausea's gone now... but I still feel weak. I had to sit down and rest in the middle of a store. More on my unsuccessful shopping trip later, when I have the energy.

(Wanted to post this last night, but blogger was upgrading my page and couldn't log in.)
Not-So-Breaking News

The Iraqi Information Minister has been captured. Good. Maybe that means people will finally stop sending this picture to me.

Attention Baseball Fans:

We have a serious problem. It seems that the best baseball player this season is not going to garner enough votes to be a first-team All-Star. Let me repeat. The best player in baseball won't be an All-Star starter.

Albert Pujols of the St. Louis Cardinals is leading the Major League in Batting Average (.384) and Slugging Percentage (.720). He's also tied for the Major League Lead with 27 Doubles and 67 Runs Scored.

Not enough for you? The kid is best in the National League in Hits (103), second in the NL in Runs Batted In, and third in NL Home Runs (21).

In OPS, considered the most accurate statistic of offensive production, he's also first in the league.

Currently, Barry Bonds, Sammy Sosa and Gary Sheffield lead Albert Pujols in the voting. Yet none of them have numbers even close to his.
So, if there's any justice in this world, you'll go to MLB.com and Vote for Albert Pujols as a National League All-Star Outfielder.

Pep Rally

One of the most fun parts of my job is sometimes one of the cruddiest parts of my job: Appearing in promos. A lot of people don't like doing the public appearances and whatnot that come with the job, and I can understand that. Usually, I don't mind. It's fun because I get the chance to goof around a little, and I get a chance to "be myself" rather than be the "sports lady." But sometimes it stinks because I either have to come in early or come in on my day off to shoot them.

Today, we shot an on-air promo with the Wardogs, our arena football team. We're sponsoring a half-time event at one of the games, so we headed down to the Civic Center, threw on a couple of football jerseys, and hammed it up for the cameras. It took about an hour, and it was just a couple of the players, plus Cory, Dave (my boss) and me, so it was a good time. Oh, and I almost forgot. One of the players told me I have pretty eyes. Hee-hee.

Of course, it would have been better if I hadn't had to come in three hours early to do it, but Dave and I really don't have any down-time during our regular hours, so it was the only time we could do it.

I just hope I don't look like too big of a dork when the thing airs.

Break out the Vegemite

Ok, I'm lazy and don't have the energy to blog tonight (plus I have to be up kind of early tomorrow).
As a compromise, I'm posting my results for the "What country of the world are you" quiz.
Peace.

Australia -
Founded as a gigantic prison colony, Australia has
turned into a Mid-Level world power. Known for
its wildlife and culture.

Positives:
Reformed.
Culturally Admired.
Mid-Level Power.
Renouned Flora and Fauna.

Negatives:
Founded by Criminals.
Island Nation (Isolated).
Talk Funny.

Which Country of the World are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Forbes' Celebrity 100

Jennifer Aniston? #1? WTF?
Seriously, I just don't get it. She's my least favorite "Friend."
I don't have a problem with her, but for God's sake, she was in "Rock Star."

Guilty Pleasures

When I drive home from work on Sunday nights, I usually listen to the Allan Handelman Show. You never know who might be on. A couple of weeks ago, Al Lewis (Grandpa Munster) was on, last week it was some guy who said that Planet X was going to collide with the earth. Tonight, the band Skid Row was one of the guests.

Now, I have a serious soft spot for hair bands. Skid Row is no exception. I remember one night, my friend Sue and I were perusing the aisles at Meijer well after midnight, and we came across all of these fake street signs in the toy department. They looked like the type of things you find on the walls in a fraternity house basement. The signs all said lame things like "Yellow Brick Road" and "Easy Street." I found one that said "Skid Row" and we thought that was about the coolest thing in the world, so I bought it.

The problem with Skid Row now is that Sebastian Bach isn't the lead singer anymore. He's busy doing broadway shows and trying to be a legitimate singer. I'll probably remember him most fondly for being part of some pretty funny sketches on Saturday Night Live.

FYI for hockey fans: Phoenix Coyotes goaltender Zac Bierk is Sebastian Bach's little brother. Oh, and their dad was one of Canada's most famous painters. Go figure.

So my little Skid Row flashback was the first guilty pleasure of the evening. But it wasn't the last. When I got home, WE: Women's Entertainment (a network I rarely watch) was showing a true guilty pleasure: "The Cutting Edge." Nothing like a sappy hockey-player-falls-in-love-with-figure-skater movie to get the ol' blood pumping.

Yay, Me! (and about a dozen other people)

The "Gabby Awards" were named a couple of weeks ago, and nobody at work has mentioned a thing to us about it yet. Well, tonight, I checked the GAB website, and sure enough, we won a "Gabby" for a sports special we did last October, "The Hundred Years' War."

About a dozen or more of us worked on it... it was one of three half-hour specials we did in a months' time. It was the worst month of my life... Because it was during football season, I averaged eighty hours a week for that stretch. I think I'm still catching up on sleep, nine months later.

Another Reason...

To say only nice things about my co-workers on this blog.

Reality Bites

Why can't things like this happen to the "Real World" house or the cast of "American Idol?"

Bookworm

Well, the big story tonight was the new Harry Potter book... We even did a live shot from a local bookstore about the new book. I've never read any of the Harry Potter series, though they look like the type of stuff I would have loved as a kid. Maybe one day.

When I was a kid, all I did was read. That sounds like a complete exaggeration, but it really isn't. In the summer, I'd ride my bike to the library, load up my bike basket with five or six books, then come home and bury my nose in them all day long. The day I discovered the "Young Adult" section in the library was probably the most exciting day of my 10-year-old life. One time, when I was grounded for crummy grades, I not only wasn't allowed to watch tv, listen to my stereo or talk on the phone... I also wasn't allowed to "escape by reading."

As an adult, I just don't have the time to read like I used to. I go through little reading spurts, usually when I go on vacation and buy a paperback at the airport. Several years ago, I discovered books on tape, and they've gotten me through a lot of very long drives. When I lived in Kirksville, I'd go to the library and check out five or six of them for the drive to Michigan and back. Now I get one nearly every time I have to go someplace like Albany or Macon to shoot a baseball/football/basketball game. It makes the drive go so much faster. I usually stick to mysteries by authors who I traditionally like: Elmore Leonard, Carl Hiaasen, Sue Grafton, Patricia Cornwell. Most of them are pretty prolific, so I can usually find a book that I haven't read by at least one of them.

About a year and a half ago, Jan got me hooked on the Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich. Crime humor, easy reading, seriously fun stuff. The first line of the first Plum novel is : "There are some men who enter a woman's life and screw it up forever. Joseph Morelli did this to me-- not forever, but periodically." I was hooked immediately. The new book hits the shelves in 25 days, and I can't wait. The first chapter of the new book is online, in fact, the opening chapter of all of the Stephanie Plum books are online at www.evanovich.com.

More Stalking

Yesterday, somebody linked to this site using the google search "Brock and Cory at KTVO in Kirksville."
Methinks now that somebody's just being a weenie and trying to yank my chain.

On the other hand, someone else found this site immediately after searching for "Pictures of people with bird poop." Huh???

My River Runneth Over

The 'Hooch (or the Chattahoochee River, for those of you not from the South) is flooding again.

The timing is kind of odd. Just two days ago, I was looking at the pictures I took of the last flood, and thought to myself "Gee, I should post some of those pictures on my blog." I went down to the river, to take some pictures of what it's supposed to look like, so I could do a sort of before and after thing. Unfortunately, hardly any of those pictures turned out.

But, as a little teaser, I'll give you a couple anyway.

Here's the Phenix City Ampitheatre,
On the left, one day after the flood crested. On the right, from a photo I swiped off another site.

Wedded Bliss

This makes sense, I guess. I mean, we've all dated dogs at one time or another, right?

The Jig is Up

For half a year, I managed to covertly blog away, without fear of my co-workers reading this. Then today, some weenie leaked word of my blog to my co-workers, so it's officially been discovered by my newsroom cronies. Now, at first, I was pretty peeved about the whole thing. This blog was my one sanctuary from work, the one place where I could bitch about my job and not fear the repercussions (at least not too much). I even considered going back and deleting every entry where I bitched about my job.

But then I realized that I'd have to delete almost every damn thing I've written for the last six months. That ain't gonna happen. So here's the new ground rules. I'm still bitching about work, though I'll try to avoid bitching about individuals I work with. But if you do something that pisses me off so much that I feel the need to vent about it, tough luck. If you don't want to hear about it, don't read it.

Agreed??? good.

Monetary Windfall

Ok, so maybe it's not exactly a "windfall," but it's money, and it's coming my way. When I was visiting the 'Ville, my friend Amy mentioned to me that the tax laws regarding student loan deductions had changed. Well, I looked into it, and damned if she wasn't right! (IRS Publication 553, Page 4) Suddenly, I had $367.00 in deductable interest, just waiting to be claimed. I finally got off my duff today, and filled out the amended tax forms. I should be getting $53 back from the IRS and another $24 from the state. Like I said, it's not a windfall, but it's a slight breeze at least.

Don't Stop Believin'

VH-1's seriously lame "Top 100 Songs of the Last 25 Years" is on right now (All I have to say is that "MMMBop" by Hanson is on the list. Need I say more?). It's funny. It's been close to 20 years since the first time I heard Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'," and I still get irritated every time I hear the line:
"Just a city boy,
born and raised in South Detroit."
As we all know, there is no such thing as South Detroit. South of Detroit is Windsor, Ontario. Really, it's kind of a geographic oddity.

Peachy Keen

Has anyone out there caught "Keen Eddie" yet? It's on Fox at 9:00 (ET) on Tuesdays, sort of an off-season replacement for "24" (an amazing show in it's own right).

Anyway, it's not a bad little show. It has kind of a Guy Ritchie-ish "Snatch" feel to it... a dark comedy, takes place in jolly ol' England, features quirky characters and bumbling criminals. Oh, and fans of Days of our Lives will note that Eddie is played by a former Jack Deveraux. He sucked as Smiling Jack, but he's pretty good on this show.

Oh, and my animal-luvin' readers will like the backstory on "Pete The Dog." In real life, he was rescued from a crack dealer. How cool is that?

Uh-Oh Again

The KTVO stalker strikes again. Just checked my recent visits, and apparently someone found my blog while doing a google search for "sandy and ktvo tv". Look out, pal!

Well, Duh! (part II)

A headline on ESPN.com today: "7-foot-5 NBA Prospect has Pituitary Gland Disorder."

Uh... he's 18 years old and 7'5". Is there anyone on this earth who wouldn't think that he had a slight malfunction in the ol' growth hormones?

Kitties!

I don't speak Russian, but this website makes me want to learn. The pictures are great no matter what language you speak!

Uh-Oh

Methinks someone is cyber-stalking my friend Brock. Someone recently accessed my blog using the search string "Brock at KTVO TV 3 Kirksville Missouri."

Look out, Broccoli! They're coming to get you!

Sucked In Again

Got sucked into another info-mercial this weekend. This time it was the bodydome. A fascinating piece of equipment... 1/3 balloon, 1/3 trampoline, 1/3 nautilus.

About once a year, I feel the need to purchase some kind of crazy exercise equipment. Two years ago, it was the ab-slide. Last year, the ab-tronic. I get the products, use them for a little while, notice a slight improvement (though probably just psychosomatic), then work gets crazy and I don't have the time or the energy to exercise. And once I fall out of the pattern, it's over.

Problem with the bodydome? Damn thing costs nearly three times as much as either of my ab-products. Looks like it's just a pipe dream. But a girl can dream, can't she?

I.S.P.O'ed.

I've come to the conclusion that our Internet Service Provider sucks. I was all excited when we got our cable modem and medium-speed internet (high speed was just wayyy too expensive). Well, for the third straight night this week, I couldn't get online for a stretch of well over an hour. What's up with that?

Under-used phrases

One of my co-workers used the phrase "screwed the pooch" today at work. I've been repeating it at random times throughout the day just to amuse myself: "Wow, you really screwed the pooch on that one."

Well, Duh!

I don't think this should come as a surprise to anyone.

Wedd-sites

My recent wedding obsession has led me to some fun websites. www.uglydress.com is one of my favorites at the moment. It's mostly photos of ugly bridesmaid's dresses, though there's a few ugly wedding gowns and other accessories. This pair of shoes is a personal favorite of mine.

Grrrrrr....

So I get another week off during the first week of July. Two days ago, I checked airfares to Detroit, and it was a fairly reasonable price: I think about $170.00 or so. Tonight, I checked again... and it's jumped up to $239.00! Blimey!

I can only wait a few more days for the price to go down... then I'll try to priceline something cheap. Otherwise, looks like I'll be driving the ol' Sunfire.

My Techno-Ineptitude Rears it's Ugly Head Again

I bought an el-cheapo digital camera last night, and came home with visions of bloggy goodness.

"Ah!" shouted the Sportslady, as she hopped about the livingroom with glee, "Finally, I can post pictures to my blog with ease. No more scanning, tweaking, and uploading for this chickie!"

Two hours later, collapsed on the floor in a heap of frustration, the Sportslady gave up. The damn thing's going back to Target tomorrow.

Words I Don't Use Nearly Enough:

"Vittles."

Yahoo!! I'm a Geek!

I just scored a 22.28797% on the Geek Test. Apparently that means I'm a geek, but not a Total Geek, Extreme Geek, or Disfunctional Geek.

I guess I can live with that.

Proud to be an American

Anyone who thinks this country isn't going to hell in a handbasket: Read this, and think again.

Poor, Poor Adam

Anne, Melissa, and all other "antmusic" fans: it appears Adam Ant has hit rock bottom. I'm sure the folks at VH1 are scrambling to get an episode of "Behind The Music" in the works.

No Escape

My week off from work is almost over. Let me ask you this: Why is it that I can't take a week off without having nightmares about my job nearly every night?

I'm a Canadian Wanna-be

I've been sitting here watching the 2003 NHL Awards, and it's nights like this that I really miss the CBC. I know, ESPN's coverage of the show is exactly the same as CBC's, but for some reason, it's just better on Canadian TV.

I grew up watching CBC Television and Mr. Dressup was one of my favorite shows as a little kid. I was really bummed out when he died a couple of years ago, and had a hell of a time explaining who Mr. Dressup was to everyone (think of a Canadian Mr. Rogers). There was also a Canadian show called "The Friendly Giant" that I really dug, too.

As a teenager, I always watched the city of Windsor, Ontario's local newscasts on CBET. They always had much better hockey coverage... and even cooler, they had a female sports anchor, the first one I'd ever seen!

Of course, I discovered a lot of other good reasons to watch the CBC... The Red Green Show, The Kids in the Hall (Before they got all Americanized by CBS), and reruns of every British comedy you can think of. And then there's HNIC.

We have directtv in the sports office at work, so I get the chance to watch Hockey Night In Canada (and perhaps more important, Don Cherry's intermission show, Coach's Corner) at work. You just can't beat it.

By the way, I'm quite pleased with the NHL awards overall. Barret Jackman of the St. Louis Blues won the Calder Trophy (Rookie of the Year), Nick Lidstrom won the Norris Trophy (Best Defenseman) for his third straight season, and Steve Yzerman won the Masterton Trophy (For Perseverance... sort of a "Comeback Player of the Year" award).



By the way, for those of you that have heard the evil Scotty Bowman/New York Rangers rumor, take heart. The Sporting News says it ain't so. Phew!

Is It Wrong...

... that I find "monkeypox" to be one of the funniest words in the English Language?

That's Why I Love Him

So tonight, Cory and I went to the movies, and afterwards he headed out to the Winn-Dixie to get some ice cream (his braces made his mouth hurt, so an icy treat was in order). I asked him to bring me a surprise.

Not only did he bring me a pint of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream, but he also brought home a dozen roses.

You gotta love him.

Back from the 'Ville, Part II

I mentioned in an earlier post that I think Kirksville is cursed. I should say that lots of good things happened while we were back in the 'Ville. For one thing, I got to see a lot of friends I haven't seen in ages.

Friday, our first full day back in town, my friend Amy drove all the way up from Jefferson City to have lunch with us. That's about a 2-hour drive. I haven't seen her since Cory and I first started dating, probably about two years ago. She looked great, and it seems like things are going well for her (She works for the Missouri State Legislature, and they're apparently in a budget crisis. Looks like I got out of there just in time.) We had lunch at Bogie's in Kirksville, a bar/restaurant in the 'Ville that we used to frequent all the time. They have the most spectacular onion rings in the world. I felt kind of bad that we had lunch with a bunch of people, and that it couldn't just be the two (or three) of us, but we had a good time, anyway.

Also joining us at lunch were my ex-boyfriend Rich and our friend from KTVO, Brock. Cory, Rich, Brock and I all worked together at KTVO, though Brock is the only one that still works there. Rich is a Ph.D student at LSU, and he's back in Kirksville for the summer teaching classes at Moberly Area Community College (A job I helped him get, thank you very much). I was kind of bummed out that we missed his new girfriend, though. She'd been in town on her first-ever trip to Kirksville the previous week. If that didn't scare her off, nothing will.

Saturday night was the big night, though. Our pal Sandy drove up from Moberly, Missouri, where she'd been visiting her parents. She's a grad student/speech team coach at Northwest Missouri State. I haven't seen her in quite a while, and she brought along her little sister, Jodi. The last time I saw Jodi, she was a 17-year-old that we were sneaking into bars. Now she's 21! It was great to see both of them, and I finally got to see a picture of Sandy-bean's fiance. Anyway, we went out to some of the 'Ville's finest bars. We got to hang out with other pals from around town, John and Josh. As usual, John got a little too looped and kept telling us how much he loved us, hugging us all over the place.

We capped off the night the same way we capped off so many nights in Kirksville: At Pancake City. In Kirksville tradition, there was puke all over the ladies' room floor. Ahhhhhh... smells like home.

The only thing that sucked about the whole weekend is that Cory and I both felt like we'd spread ourselves really thin. He only got to spend about an hour with his high-school friend Travis, and that was pretty much the trend for the weekend. It seemed like we spent more time saying goodbye instead of hello.

Holiday Shopping

As we all know, Father's day is just around the corner... and generally, I love shopping for gifts. I usually start Christmas shopping around September, and don't stop until December 24th. But Father's Day is a different story. My father has to be just about the hardest person in the world to shop for.

When I was a little kid, it was easy. Steve had a handlebar moustache that he curled up on both ends (don't laugh... it was cool in the '70s), so every year, I'd buy him a little tube of moustache wax. Yes, such a thing actually exists.

Then, when I got older (and got a raise in my allowance), we progressed to the old standby-- the necktie. Ties and dress shirts seemed to work well into my adulthood.

Now, here's the problem. For the past few years, Steve's worked in the Warren Tech Center (with about 20,000 others. It's strange to think that more people work there than live in Kirksville, Missouri). Anyway, the dress code there is "business casual." Translation: no neckties necessary. Father's Day has gone completely downhill since then. Last year, I got him a gift certificate for the Outback Steakhouse, which was all right, I guess. To me, buying a gift certificate is like admitting defeat. It says: "I couldn't think of anything better to get you." (The exception is weddings, when it says "All the crap on your registry was ugly, and I didn't want to be seen in public purchasing items in such bad taste. Go buy them yourself.")

Again, I digress. Today, I found a Father's Day gift, but I honestly don't know if he'll like it or not. In fact, I have to run to the post office right now to mail it. And no, it's not a membership in the "Friends of the Handlebar Club," either... though don't think I didn't consider it.

Yahoo!!!!!

I almost forgot to mention the most exciting piece of news I've received in ages... I don't have to go back to work until Saturday!!!!!!!!!!

Ouch!!!

I have rollerblades. I rarely use them. Perhaps it's because I fear something like this will happen to me.

Good Intentions

My dad forwarded this one along a few days ago... like him, I'm not sure I buy the setup, but the picture is worth it.

Don't you just love it when teachers' good intentions go amuck!!!

An elementary school class started a class project to make a planter to take home to their parents.
They wanted to have a plant in it that was easy to take care of, so they decided to use cactus plants.

The students were given greenware pottery planters in the shape of a clown which they painted with glaze.
The clown planters were professionally fired at a class outing so they could see the process.
It was great fun.

They planted cactus seeds in the finished planters and they grew nicely but unfortunately
the children were not allowed to take them home...

The cactus plants were removed and small ivy replaced them and the children were then allowed to take them home instead.
The teacher said Cactus seemed like a good idea at the time!!

Gettin' Hitched in the Country

I promised a few days ago that I'd talk a little about small-town weddings. I've been to a few of them after living in Kirksville for the better part of a decade. As a city girl, I've also been to more than my share of big-city (or at least big-suburb) weddings.

Small-town weddings are kind of difficult to grasp when you're used to the massive productions that I grew up attending. Most of the weddings I've been to in Detroit, St. Louis and Chicago were pretty large affairs- about 250 guests (at least), and a dinner reception. Small-town weddings are, of course, smaller, and much less formal. It's not unusual to see someone wearing a polo shirt to a small-town wedding... and it's not unheard-of to see a few guests wearing jeans (usually black jeans) and a tee-shirt.

The bridal party is also usually pretty small. I think I've seen a maximum of two bridesmaids at the small-town weddings I've been to. Compare that with a college friend of mine (who'll remain nameless to protect her anonimity), who had eight (yes, eight) bridesmaids.

The reception is a completely different affair as well. I've always grown up with the city-girl notion that a reception is kind of like a prom with an open bar. You buy a new dress, eat a huge meal, gossip with friends, dance a lot, and get hammered. In the country, the reception pretty much optional. All of the small-town weddings I've been to have had a reception but every time, the reception has been at the church (or wherever the wedding was held). Two of them were real casual: deli-trays and punch. The other was even more casual: Pizza and beer. Two of them didn't even have music.

Now, I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with having a casual wedding... I just don't want to have one that way. I want a big-ass party, with big-ass dresses and a big-ass meal and a big-ass open bar. I can't help it... I'm a city girl at heart.

Goin' to the Chapel

I hate when this happens. Every time I go to a wedding, I go a little nutty for a few weeks afterwards. Not an "oh-my-god-my-clock-is-ticking" kind of nutty... or even a "holy-crap-I'm-33-and-unmarried" kind of nutty. More of a "I-wanna-wear-a-big-poofy-dress" kind of nutty. I look at wedding dresses online, dream about where I want to have my wedding, and all that other girly crap. It usually lasts about a week, then I return to normal.

Local Boy Does Good

The pride of Phenix City Alabama, Tim Hudson of the Oakland A's, is on the mound pitching against the Braves right now. I got a chance to interview Tim a few months back, and I have to say, he's a really nice kid. He was really looking forward to his first time facing Atlanta, since he grew up watching the Braves.

Here's a little sampling of how nice Hudson is: He won 15 games for Oakland last year, and is a big reason why they've advanced to the playoffs three straight seasons. In the off-season (February, I think), the Phenix City Girls' Club hosted a roast for him at the high school. No big celebs, no major-market media exposure, but Tim came back to his home town, had a couple of his old high school and college coaches tease him for a while, and signed autographs for hours.

Thank You, Oakland University

My minor in Art History has finally come in handy, though I barely passed the "Art or Crap?" quiz. I got 11 correct out of 16 (for a whopping 68 percent).

You Can't Go Home Again

Ok, I don't really consider Kirksville, Missouri my "home town." That honor goes to the city of Detroit and its neighboring suburbs. But I haven't lived in the Detroit area since 1992, and since I lived in Cory's home town of K-ville for seven years, it's really the next best thing.

Kirksville, I've felt for some time, may be cursed. A couple of lousy things that happened in my return to Kirksville:
1. Friday morning, the day after arriving in town, I took my left contact out of the case, and it was ripped in half. For those of you that don't know me, I'm blind as a bat. Of course, I had my glasses with me, but it still sucked. I was overdue for a trip to the eye doctor anyway, but I was putting it off as long as possible. He doesn't speak English very well, so it's kind of a lengthy ordeal to get my new prescription.
2. It's just spring in the 'Ville, so my allergies were terrible. I really haven't had much allergy trouble at all here in Georgia- If I'm going to be outside all day, I take half an allergy pill and I'm fine. Not in Missouri, though. I was popping pills left and right, and still pretty miserable. Apparently, there's a lot more nasty pollen up there than here in the Peach State.

Oh, and of course, we can't forget the constant harassment about marriage and grandchildren. Fun, fun, fun!

Ahhhhh... Home Sweet Home

And speaking of Detroit, here's a lovely news item from the 'burbs.

Internationally Known

I forgot to mention, in my earlier post, that we've had more international visitors. Ireland, Brazil, and the Cocos Islands. If you're anything like me, you have absolutely no clue where the Cocos (Keeling) Islands are.

According to the website, they're "situated approximately 2,700 kilometres north-west of Perth, 3,800 km north-west of Darwin and 1,000 km south-west of Java." Once again, if you're anything like me, that wasn't very helpful. According to this map, they're kind of between Australia and Indonesia. It looks like paradise, which makes me wonder, why would anyone in paradise be sitting inside, surfing the internet?

On a side note, the Cocos Islands have Red-Footed Boobys. Not really that significant, I just wanted to use the word "Booby" on this blog to see if anyone would stumble across it (See "New Visitors" below)

Back from the 'Ville

Cory and I arrived back in Columbus at a little after noon today. It was one of those weekend vacations that makes you feel like you need a vacation when you get back. I'm pooped out. When we got back to the apartment, I read the mail, watered my plants, and went straight to bed for a three-hour nap.

Many stories to come. The wedding was very small-town, and since most of my readers are city folks like me, I'll dish the dirt on rural weddings in an upcoming post. Also, I'll tell you about the five pounds of fat I managed to add in just three days. For now, just a brief note about something that happened this morning.

We stayed Sunday night at Cory's dad's house in the Kansas City area (Blue Springs, for those of you that care). Our flight out of the KC Airport was at 7:10 am, so that Cory could get to work on time (half-past noon). Anyway, we pass through the screening area at the airport, and I'm standing at the little conveyor belt, waiting for my stuff to roll out. Now, I travel enough that I have a little regimen. I don't wear jewelry on the plane unless it's gold, I don't wear belts on flight-day, and I make sure to wear shoes that don't have little metal doohickeys on them (like shoelace eyelets). I generally also wear khakis, so that I don't have a metal button on my pants. It just makes life a lot easier for myself and for the security folks.

The dude behind me, apparently, did not feel the same way. He's probably about my age, and doesn't take off any of his jewelry to go through the metal detector, and (surprise) the thing goes off. So they have to scan him, and make him take off all his jewelry. Well, this tool doesn't want to take off his watch and hand it over to the security guy. He actually snarls at the guy, "This is a ten-thousand dollar watch." What an ass.

Now, here's some thoughts about this guy:
1. If I owned a $10,000 watch, I sure as hell wouldn't take it on vacation.
2. If I owned a $10,000 watch, I wouldn't advertise it in a place like an airport.
3. (This one I realized as he boarded our flight) If I owned a $10,000 watch, I wouldn't be flying coach class!

New Visitors

This blog has had a lot of new visitors lately. I blame the Montgomery Biscuits. Apparently, when you search for info on the Biscuits on google, yahoo, and other search engines, my blog pops up. I feel pretty badly for the people who visit my little corner of the web and leave with a head full of my inane ramblings.

One of these poor souls is Kris from Prattville, Alabama. He actually liked my inane ramblings about Montgomery's Minor League team so much that he's linked to this site from his blog, "The World Around You." His ramblings are much more succinct, and I might add, he writes about much more important stuff (World, National, and Alabama Politics). I hope his peeps aren't looking for anything too enlightening on this page, or else I fear they'll leave sadly disappointed.

Other recent visitors have found me using these different search strings:
Old Columbus Georgia Postcards
Sunny 100 Cruise Columbus (I might add, I don't think I've ever even listened to "Sunny 100" since moving here)
Retro Pool Postcards
and my personal favorite...
Queen Latifah Boobs (I kid you not)

Blogging Lite

By the way, Blogging will be light the next few days. Cory and I have a wedding to attend, and the Belmont Stakes will be monopolizing my entire day Saturday.

Ahhhhhhhh.

After working eight straight days (and 17 of the last 18), I finally got a whole day off from work on Thursday. And I do mean a whole day. No annoying phone calls from my boss, wanting to know where I put a tape. No quick drive up to the station to meet Cory for dinner. Oh, it was so nice.

Actually, one thing really sucked. For once, the weather on my day off was beautiful, but I had to do laundry, so I decided, since the laundry room's right next to the pool, that I'd go hang out by the pool while I waited for my laundry to finish. So, I grabbed my swimsuit, my towel, my cassette player, and a book-on-tape, and laid around for a while. I was the only one at the pool, until the creepy landscaping guy decided to bring his leaf-blower out and start blowing the whole pool area. Yuck. Not only was the (I repeat) creepy guy hovering around me, but the noise from his damn leafblower was so loud, I couldn't even hear my book.

Ah, well. Other than that, It was a really nice day.

Job Hazards, Part II

Another one of the hazards of working at an ABC affiliate is that I often don't know what the hell's on any other network. Most of the television I catch on other networks is stuff I just stumble across. Tonight, I stumbled across the American Film Institute's 100 Years: Heroes and Villains, a show I would have loved to watch all the way through. Instead, I caught about the last half hour of it, basically the top 5 heroes/villains.

After seeing some of their painfully obvious choices (Villains: Darth Vader and The Wicked Witch of the West, Heroes: James Bond and Indiana Jones), I was expecting a real cop-out for their all-time hero. You know; Superman or Batman or Luke Skywalker. Imagine my pleasant surprise when it was Atticus Finch from "To Kill a Mockingbird." Nice choice. My faith in the film community has been restored, if only briefly.

One disappointment, though. Babe was a nominee, but never made the list. I mean, if we can't all feel better about our lives because of a sheep-herding pig, what's the use?

I couldn't find a complete list of the top 100 on the net (apparently AFI doesn't want to release it until everyone that TiVo'ed the special has a chance to see it), but you can see the top 40 here.

The Return of Teen Angst

Remember the show Freaks and Geeks? Great show, filled with 1980s retro high school teen angst? According to Quizilla, I could have starred in it:

You are Lindsay. Navigating your 80's high school
is hard. Never popular, you opt for freakdom
over geekdom. Still, you hope an end is in
sight -- never really comfortable in either
role, you live life to the angstiest and know
that better days will come.


Which full-of-angst female TV teen are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
I'm ok with that.

Yahooooo!!!

I get Wednesday off from work!!!!!!

Bloated Tick

I am stuffed to the gills right now. As I recently blogged, I've been facing a serious vegetable shortage in my diet lately. Cheeseburger, Fries, Diet Coke. Every damn night at the damn ballpark. Finally, tonight, no baseball. No ballpark. And most important, no nasty concession stand dinner.

Unfortunately, my desire to eat fruits and veggies led me to make a poor dinner decision. See, I wanted a salad bar. I wanted cooked broccoli. I wanted fresh fruit. So Cory and I went to Ryan's (or as I affectionately call it, "The Trough"). Seriously, any restaurant that advertises "Bus Parking" on its sign probably isn't the highest quality establishment. Now, I ate good, healthy food, but I ate too damn much of it. Way too damn much of it. I seriously strapped on the feed bag. I honestly could barf.

(Insert Evil Laugh Here)

This has lots of potential.

Looney 'Toons

How much do I love the Powerpuff Girls? I'd forgotten how much I liked the show until just a few minutes ago, when I stumbled across them channel-surfing. Good stuff.

More Mascot Madness

I've been thinking a lot about the Montgomery Biscuits lately. I decided, against my original assessment (See posts from 5/28 and 5/29 for a refresher), that it's a pretty cool nickname. I mean, you've gotta give them credit... they're probably the only "Biscuits" around. It's much more original than, say, the "Tigers." This week, Auburn University hosted an NCAA regional baseball championship, and three of the four teams involved were the Auburn Tigers, the Clemson Tigers, and the Princeton Tigers.

As far as mascots go, I've been pretty lucky. I was a Woodward Elementary Wolverine, a Van Hoosen Jr. High Viking, an Adams High School Highlander, an Oakland Pioneer (now they're the Golden Grizzlies), and a CMU Chippewa. If you count the schools where I've taught, I've also been a Cranbrook Crane, a MACC Greyhound, and a Truman Bulldog. If it weren't for Truman, I'd have a run of some pretty creative mascots.

My favorite mascot? Has to be a high school in Northeast Missouri. The Putnam County Midgets.

I kid you not.

Karma, Karma, Karma, Karma....

Cory and I were out grilling tonight, and I noticed some of my plants needed watering. So I was watering my bougainvillea, and noticed one of these little guys on it. He was pretty cute. I said to Cory, "Hey, there's a little brown lizard on the plant," but then the little fella hid under a couple of leaves. A few minutes later, he poked his head up at us, and this time he was a little green lizard.

Oh, it should be noted that the bougainvillea in the link looks absolutely nothing like the one on our patio. Mine hasn't flowered in at least two months.

Invasion of the Mutant Giants

By the way, when Cory and I went to the afforementioned IHOP, I was wearing my clunky loafers. (I call them clunky because they have a very high stacked heel on them... about 3" square)

For those of you that have never met Cory, I should probably tell you that he's 6'5". For those of you that have never met me, I'm 5'9", and in my clunky loafers, I measure 6 feet tall. So there we were, in all our 6-foot-plus glory. The cashier was, at the tallest, 5'2". We looked like complete mutant freaks as we paid our bill.

More from the Glamorous TV Life

I can't remember the last time I ate a vegetable. Crappy eating habits are one of the many hazards of my job. We don't get out of the early newscasts until about 6:35, and baseball/basketball/football/hockey games usually start at 7:00 or so, which means no time for din-din. Luckily, most pro & college sports teams feed the media that comes to the game.

Sometimes, the food is actually pretty good. For example, the Cottonmouths always have a local restaurant cater their press-room meals, so its a hit-or miss proposition... one night it'll be Burger King, the next night it'll be Texas Roadhouse. I eat whatever's there... beggars can't be choosers.

Baseball season sucks, though. They feed us at every game, but it's concession-stand food. Every night for the last week, I've covered the Waves games, so it's been a cheeseburger, fries, and a diet coke for dinner. Every night.

Since Dave's still on vacation, I've been flying solo in the sports department, so tonight I didn't have time for dinner at all. After the late newscast, there aren't a whole lot of places still open, so Cory and I hit the IHOP at 1:00 am. Problem is, there's no "big salad" on the late-night menu. The most nutritious thing I could find was the "Banana Split Pancakes." Seriously. So, I'm still veggie-less, and I feel like crap because of it.

I'm baaaaaaack...

Blogging again after a two-day hiatus. I've been really busy at work, but that's not why I've neglected you all. Cory has been monopolizing the computer for the last two nights. Both Thursday and Friday, I came home from work brimming with thoughts for the blog. Both nights, I walked in the apartment to find Cory fiddling with his blog. He apparently screwed up something in the html code, and the whole thing got ganked up. Last night, I finally offered to help (the blind leading the blind), and we pored over hundreds of lines of code trying to figure out what he did wrong. Mind you, neither of us really know much about computer stuff, so it was pretty much trial and error. By the time we got it all fixed, my eyes and brain hurt too much to blog, and I went to bed.

I'm going to try to reconstruct some of the things I wanted to blog about, but it may take me a while. My mind is drawing a blank at the moment.