How Cool is this?

So, you don't want to carve a pumpkin. They're messy. They turn to mush. Nobody trusts you with a knife.

Never fear, you can carve a virtual pumpkin online.

Here's the one I made.

Now, go make your own, and be sure to show it off to all of us by putting the link to your virtual jack-o-lantern in the comments!

Hide! It's the Grammar Police!

Ok, so I've been accused of being a "Grammar Nazi" more than once in my life. And I admit, it drives me absolutely crazy to see misplaced apostrophes, commas, and quotation marks. Sure, it's one thing in a hastily scribbled note, and I'm willing to let one or two little incidents slide-- but it absolutely drives me crazy when the people who goofed presumably know better.

For example, about a month ago, I was watching tv when I saw a promo for MY SHOW. There I was, on the boob-tube with my co-workers, talking about high school football. Then came the dreaded text:

Friday's at 11:15

Really? Friday's? I wasn't aware that "Friday" owned anything.

It was after 5pm, so I knew that if I called the station, nobody in charge would be there. Instead, I immediately typed an email to my boss, to the promotions manager, and to the news director. The promo was corrected the next day.

But here's the worst part. The email I got back from the promotions manager (thanking me for noticing the error) said one word:

Thank's!

I sh*t you not. And I'm pretty sure he wasn't joking.

I know that some of my friends (ahem... Cory and Melissa) feel the same way that I do about poor punctuation... and now, I've found many more, at The “Blog” of “Unnecessary” Quotation Marks (ironic use of quotation marks intended).

Maybe I should start a companion-- The Blog of Misplaced Apostrophe's (once again, irony intended).

Homesick?

Regular visitors to the ol' sportslady blog will no doubt recall that I wasn't particularly fond of my time spent in Georgia. Sure, there were good times (like Music Midtown, which, sadly, is now defunt), but there were also bad times, like the crazy hours I worked at two evil stations which shall remain nameless.

But every now and then, something happens which makes me miss my time in C-Town. Like a month ago, when I had my first encounter with USF's head football coach. The encounter lasted a whole ten seconds, and I learned quickly that he's a self-important ass with the social skills of one of Michael Vick's pitbulls. I think back to how lucky I was to cover Auburn University. Tommy Tuberville is a class act, and Auburn will always be one of my favorite teams because of him.

And then, there's this: A little video I stumbled across on YouTube.


I miss obscenely-dancing mascots. This one, actually, is pretty tame, compared to some of the dancing mascots I saw back in the Peach State. If you can't watch someone in a fuzzy costume perform dance moves that would get them arrested anywhere else, then what's the fun of high school football?

The Right Chemistry

I didn't do very well in high school chemistry class... I don't remember what grade I got, but I suspect that whatever grade I earned also earned me a semester of being grounded.

The reason I didn't do well in chemistry? I couldn't grasp the concept of the mol. It made absolutely no sense to me.

Apparently, I needed to know about National Mol(e) Day, which apparently was yesterday. The funny thing is, the explanation of what a mol is on their website makes perfect sense to me now. And I'm much, much, much dumber than I was 20+ years ago. So now, I'm just confused.

Mmmmmmm.... Rice......

So, you think you're a smartypants.
And you're not a fan of world hunger.

Boy, have I found the website for you: Free Rice.

Think of it as the vocabulary portion of the SAT-- except for each correct answer, instead of getting into a better college, you donate rice to an impoverished nation. Ok-- so it's only ten grains of rice per vocabulary word. But hopefully, you're smart enough get more than just one definition right.

Socks gets the Boot

I'm pretty torn on Hillary Clinton-- Yes, she's smart, she's capable, she's professional, and I think, quite honestly, she'd make a pretty good president... if she wasn't Hillary Clinton. And no, this isn't a gender issue... at least not in my mind.

As a potential president, she's really in a no-win situation. She's such a polarizing political figure that any actions she would make would be over-analyzed, criticized and villified-- and that's by both the right and left.

But here's my real problem with Hillary. She dumped Socks. Remember him? That cute little kitty-cat who inhabited the White House with Bill, Hillary, Chelsea and Buddy? Well, when the Clintons moved out, they took Buddy with them.

They pawned poor Socks off to Betty Currie.

Sure, the Clintons had bigger fish to fry. Bill had to go be a rock star. Hillary had to run for Senate. Chelsea had to go to college.

But seriously, how hard is it to take care of a cat? I can tell you from experience, as long as there's food in Zoe's dish-- and an occasional scritch under her chin or stroke of her belly-fur, she's pretty content. In fact, I sometimes think she prefers it when we're not around and she can be queen of the castle.

Really, I guess Socks was the lucky one. Poor ol' Buddy Clinton got run over by a car a year after moving out of the White House. Socks Clinton Currie is still alive and well and living in Hollywood, Maryland.

Hmmm.... I wonder if Mike Gravel has a cat? He seems more like the "pet rock" type to me.

Another Stellar Sports Story...

Check this one out-- no, you won't see that pretty lady that does the sports in this one (ahem...) but it's kind of a fun little story anyway...

read more | digg story

Quick!

Click on this link and tell me... Which way is the dancer spinning?
Clockwise?
Counter Clockwise?

It's funny... Cory and I see her spinning in opposite directions.

20 Years Later...

This past weekend, Cory and I headed north for my 20-year class reunion. It was certainly an interesting experience.

First, let me say this. I was a dork in high school. Not as dorky as I was in junior high, when I had braces, thick glasses, and a bad complexion. Once I reached high school, I was just tall, skinny, pigeon-toed, and lacked fashion sense... pretty much the same as I am today. Oh, and I had a big nose back then. About eight years ago, it magically "shrinked" into the adorable little pointy nose I have now.

Anyway, despite having some old-lady-wrinkles and a little bit of a belly pooch, I think I look a lot better than I did in high school. So I like going to reunions, even though I really didn't know that many people in school.

At the 10-year reunion, everyone looked pretty much the same as they did in high school. Some were thinner, some were taller, some were chubbier... but the big difference was hairstyles. This time, there were a lot of people I didn't recognize... especially the men.

On Friday night, we went to the Adams Homecoming game (we won 56-7)... and it was great, because we got there kind of early, perched up in the stands, and watched people walk up to our group. Forget everything you ever heard about how "men get more distinguished with age... women just get old." Many of the women in our class looked the way I remembered them-- but a lot of our guys have gone bald... or are getting there fast.

I really haven't decided what I want to tell you about the reunion... I'll figure it out eventually. In the meantime, enjoy the dorky picture of my name badge above.

Googling the Sportslady

I had a banner day here at the blog... apparently about 30 people visited today, and very few of them are people I know.

So, how are random strangers around the world finding me this week?
Five searches for "Erin Andrews" (Odd... usually searches for EA turn up on weekends when she's sideline reporting on ESPN)
Five searches for "Chicken Lady" (Actually, only four searches for the CL... the other was for "Kids in the Hall characters."
Speaking of freaks, there was one search for "Lobster Boy," and another for "Medical Abnormalities."

The Sportslady... bringing freaks together since January, 2003.

The 9 Manliest Names in the World

Ok... I can see "Lance Armstrong." I can see "Magnus von Magnusson." But how is "Wolf Blitzer" not on this list?

read more | digg story

This Post Brought to you by.....

...the Online Casino Bluebook.

One of my co-workers loves gambling on sports, but like me and everyone else we work with, he's broke. So it seems like every week, he comes in talking about his "7-way parlay"... where he bet $5 but if all seven games go the way that he bet, the payout is something ridiculous like $350 dollars.

I don't know if he ever hits-- but I have to admit, when I watch college football, it's always in the back of my mind. Especially when teams like Stanford (a 41-point underdog) beat teams like Southern Cal, which is what happened on Saturday night. 41 points in a conference game? You've got to be kidding me!

Now here's my problem. I don't know anything about Internet gambling. I don't know which websites are legal, who I can trust, or how to place a bet. Online Casino Bluebook might just be the answer to at least some of my questions.

The site reviews online casinos, and even ranks them based on factors like payout bonuses and customer service. Oh, and it's not just poker rooms and sports books... they even review Bingo Halls. Seriously. I didn't even know that online bingo halls existed... and we all know how much I love bingo, right? When I visited Vegas ten years ago... the first place we went wasn't a 24-hour buffet, a faux-Elvis show or Fremont Street... it was bingo hall.

The Online Casino Bluebook website says they've been around since 2000-- and I hope that at some point, they "pretty it up" a little. It's a very basic-looking site, and I think they could do themselves a favor (and maybe give themselves a little more credibility) with some fancier graphics and a nicer layout. On the other hand, it's a super-easy site to navigate.

I doubt I'll start gambling online any time soon... I'm way too broke right now to even allow myself to be tempted. On the other hand, it's nice to know that at least now, I'll know where to go if I ever want to start!

Sportslady's Disclosure Policy

This weblog is the Sportslady’s own personal blog written and edited by your favorite Sportslady. Because the Sportslady is often strapped for cash, this blog accepts forms of cash advertising, sponsorship, paid insertions or other forms of compensation.

That whole “strapped for cash” thing may influence the advertising content, topics or posts made in this blog. In other words, if I get an opportunity to discuss a topic which interests me—and get compensated for it—there’s a good chance that I will.

That said, here’s my promise to you: Even though I’m occasionally compensated to advertise or provide an opinion on products, services, websites, etc… I promise to always give you my honest opinion, findings, or beliefs. In other words, I’m not a corporate shill who’ll blow sunshine up your arse just to make a few bucks. Oh—and I’ll try to make it interesting, too. For God’s sake, I don’t want to bore you. I want you to stick around and still be my reader!

“Sponsored” posts may not always say that they’re sponsored anywhere in the content of the post itself. Yeah, I’m a little sneaky. If you're a smart or savvy reader, you'll take everything with a grain of salt anyway. I have faith in you.

By the way, when I’m plugging a product, I’m the one writing the content—so any product claim, statistic, quote or other representation about a product should probably be verified with the manufacturer, provider or party in question. I’ve been wrong once or twice in my life (Don’t tell Cory—he thinks I’m perfect!).

So there you have it… full disclosure.

To get your own policy, go to Disclosurepolicy.org

Survey Time!!!

Here's your question.... what should I dress up as for Halloween?

Remember, last year, I won a costume/karaoke contest for $100 bucks... so I not only need costume suggestions, but I also need a corresponding song suggestion (i.e. dress like a geisha, sing "Turning Japanese" by the Vapors).

Fire away...

Seeing Double

Last week, I read an online article about "Googlegangers," people you find online who share your name. I found my main googleganger long ago.

Because of the unusual spelling of my first name and (maiden) last name, I don't have as many googlegangers as, say, a "Mary Jones" or a "John Smith." Most of my maiden-name googlegangers live in Scandanavian countries, like the Danish actress seen on the right. There's also a handful of account managers, purchasers, and consultants with my name trying to network their way into a better job. There's also a secretary at the University of Southern Denmark. On zabasearch.com, I found a few others who share my name in California and Nevada.

I use my maiden name at work, so most people still know me by that name. I've never googled my new name... at least, not until today. My new googleganger (drumroll, please) is a real estate broker in Massachusetts who apparently runs in a lot of 5K races.

By the way, my mom has a googleganger who teaches Mideval literature in Alberta. My dad has one who runs an ice cream shop in Washington State. And my husband has one that runs a winery.

Who's your googleganger?

The Chicken (Lady) or the egg?

I check my blog stats a few times a week-- just to see who's visiting. (You can see them if you click on the left-side box below "My Latest Visitors")

With many of you, I can look at the city and/or state and I know who you are. I can identify other people based on information like the browsers they use (I have a few readers who use firefox, for example).

I can also find out how random strangers found my blog. The stats show me which search engine turned up my blog and the search string that net-surfers used to get that result. In the past, I've had a lot of people find me by searching for nude pictures of Erin Andrews or for information on Peaches and/or Beaches. Go figure.

But lately, I've had a lot of people stumble across my blog with the search string "Chicken Lady." Apparently, I mentioned the "Kids in the Hall" character once while describing my freakish kidney. But that was well over two years ago!

I'm not sure what the recent fascination is with the Chicken Lady, though. In fact, I'm not sure if they're trying to find information on the lovely chicken lady to the right... or if they're trying to find information on this motivational speaker, or if they're looking for a menu from this caterer.

Then again, maybe they're just waiting for another "Only in Florida" post from me... about the "Chicken Lady" who ran for mayor of Key West a few years back.

Not sure. Yesterday's "Chicken Lady" searches came from Los Angeles Calif., Reston, Va., and Greenville, S.C.

But the strangest search of the day had nothing to do with chickens. Somebody found my blog with the search string "How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?"

Isn't the internet a wonderful thing?

When it rains...

Actually, it wasn't raining when this happened... at least not literally. It was certainly raining metaphorically.

Last night, while driving home from work, I ran out of gas. Not a big deal if you're a normal person with a normal job who works normal hours. Unfortaunately, I am none of the above.

So, it's about midnight, and I'm driving through a bad neighborhood. Actually, let me define "bad." If I had run out of gas in this neighborhood during daylight hours, I would have walked to the nearby gas station. However, it was midnight. And as my co-worker Randy says, this neighborhood is reminiscent of a slightly scuzzy kitchen. It looks a little yucky when it's bright and well-light. When you shut out the light, the cockroaches start scrambling around nervously. This neighborhood is kind of the same way.

I call Cory, who hops in his truck to come pick me up. He's about 20 minutes away. I wait in my car. Cory arrives, attempts to rescue me...

...and his truck dies.
In the ghetto.
It might be the battery. Or the alternator. Or one of a million other things.

Either way, we're now with two broken-down cars in a scary neighborhood. Good times.

Anyway, Randy came to our rescue-- the street where we both broke down was also on his way home from work. Thank goodness!

Only in Florida

Our competition led with this story a couple of nights ago...

Man Kept Roommate's Body For Month