Three Things...

That put me in a really good mood today:

1) I got to wear new clothes today. Back in the winter (maybe November or December?), I spotted a really nice silk blazer on clearance at Ross. Get this: $9.99-- and it fit! There was just one catch: the jacket is cream-colored. Not exactly appropriate for the winter months. So today, for the first time, I wore it. I know it's shallow, but new clothes make me happy.

2) I've been listening to very little "modern" music lately. I usually only listen to the stereo when I'm driving, and I'm usually in a pretty tense mood because I'm going to or from work. If I'm not listening to ESPN Radio, I'm usually listening to one of the comedy channels on XM, or I'm listening to an oldies station. Oldies usually put me in a better mood. So, tonight, as I was driving home for my dinner break, I was listening to the 70s channel on XM, and they played "Tragedy" by the Bee Gees. There's something about Disco that perks me up. I don't think it's a coincidence that the happiest years of my life were years I listened to a lot of disco.

3) For the third night in a row, I made the green light at the intersection of Macon Road and I-185. I pass through this intersection at least a few times every day. See, to go northbound on the interstate from Macon Road, you have to turn left at the intersection. It's a pretty busy juncture, so there's a green arrow. Problem is, the arrow lasts for about 10 seconds... and if you don't time it perfectly, you have to wait a very long time for the next green arrow. Granted, two of the three times I made the light, I fudged it a little and turned as it was yellow. But tonight, it was totally, completely, and legitimately green.

Sometimes it doesn't take much...

Morbid Sense of Humor

Is this for real?

Just A Gigolo

It's so sad when rock stars finally decide they're washed up and find another career. Can you imagine being the girl who gets recussitated by David Lee Roth, Paramedic? I think I'd be a little afraid of what he might do to me while I was incapacitated.

Job Hotline

More plum sports assignments going to people who aren't me.

News Flash!

Ben Affleck apparently has a talent after all.

I mock Ben Affleck, but there's something about that kid that I like. Sure, he's not a great actor. Sure, he has questionable taste in women. Sure, he has equally questionable taste in film roles.

But did you see him guest-hosting Saturday Night Live this last season? Funny stuff. The kid's got moxie.

I Can't Take It Any More!

Days of our Lives has been completely blowing my mind over the last few months. The most recent plot twist on the show is even more pathetic (and unrealistic) than the legendary "Marlena's possessed" plotline of 1995.

So everyone that's dead isn't really dead. They're just living on an island that happens to be an exact replica of Salem. Twist your brain around that little riddle. How can someone who's been embalmed still be alive?

Better yet... I found out recently that Jack is returning to the show on Tuesday. Jack's been my favorite character on the show for eons, and I'm thrilled that he's returning. However, Jack isn't just dead, embalmed, and buried. His wife donated his organs. She even met the wife of the man who received Jack's heart.

This makes satanic possession sound run of the mill! These type of things could only on Days... I'm so disgusted by the whole thing that I don't want to watch any more, but it's like a train wreck... I just can't turn away.

Blonde Ambition

To know me is to know that I love blonde jokes. Odd, I realize, since I am blonde, but I guess if you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at? Really, blondes are the last minority that you can safely mock without fear of a lawsuit.

Anyway, my dad sent me this one via email tonight:
A blonde guy came home early from work and heard strange noises coming from his bedroom. He rushed upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting.

"What's up?' he asked.

"I'm having a heart attack !" the woman cried.

He rushed downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he was dialing, his four year old son came up and said, "Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Ted's hiding in your closet and he doesn't have any clothes on.".

The man slammed down the phone, stormed back upstairs, back into his bedroom, past his crying wife and ripped open the closet door. Sure enough,there was his brother, totally naked and cowering on the closet floor.

"You stupid idiot!" he shouted, "my wife's having a heart attack and you're running around naked scaring the kids!!."

Blog Slacker

Sorry kids, I just haven't been in a bloggy mood lately. I'll try to do better.

Say It Ain't So, Aretha!

In fact, Aretha does say it ain't so... her publicist and the folks at the Palace say that it just looked like she was lip-syncing (synching?) because of some kind of funky audio delay.

Hmmmm. I'd like to believe it, but I'm not so sure about that.

The world may never know.

Home, Sweet Home

Ever since leaving the suburbs of the Motor City, I've dealt with Anti-Detroit disgust. People ask where I'm from, I tell them Detroit, they sneer.

Okay, technically, I'm not from Detroit. I'm from Rochester Hills. But nobody knows where that is, and I got tired of explaining. So I'm from Detroit. Hey, nobody's perfect.

Yes, Detroit has "Devil's Night." It's the night before Halloween when all the punks come out and cause general mayhem. For 99% of the delinquents in the area, it means you egg your teacher's house and throw toilet paper in their trees. You know, the stuff that kids everywhere else do on Halloween night. (of course, the other one percent douses their teacher's house and lights it on fire. There's always one bad apple).

To me, the whole Devil's night concept makes sense, in a way: Some enterprising kid said "Wait a minute... If we vandalize things on the 30th, we have the whole night to get candy on the 31st!"

Makes sense to me.

Yes, in the 70s and 80s, Detroit was often the "murder capitol" of the U.S. But Washington DC and New Orleans have been battling for that title for the last decade. As far as overall violent crime goes, St. Louis and Atlanta usually take the cake.

Then there's the Jimmy Kimmell philosophy: If a Detroit team wins a championship, the villagers riot.

Yes, it happened in 1984 when the Tigers won. It happened again in 1990, when the Pistons won the second of their back-to-back titles. Guess what? It hasn't happened since... at least not in Detroit.

So get off my back. Yeah, Detroit isn't perfect. But at least it's interesting.

Back to the NBA

By the way, did anyone else watch the beginning of the game? I was very excited to see that Aretha Franklin would be singing the national anthem.

Excited, until she started singing. Was Aretha Lip-Synching???? It really looked like it. At first, I thought it was just the broadcast delay, but then it seemed as though ABC was intentionally not showing her, like they knew something was up, too. They only showed her for about 10 seconds during a three-second performance.

Say it ain't so, Aretha!!!

News You Can Use

Keep your eyes peeled, and steer clear of mass-murdering fundamentalist Mormons and their Playboy Centerfold girlfriends.

I don't even think I could begin to summarize the story, so I'll just include a couple key quotes from the article:

"...a lapsed Mormon accused of bludgeoning and dismembering five people in an elaborate extortion racket intended to hasten the second coming of Jesus Christ."

One of his accomplices (in addition to his pinup gal-pal) was: "...a self-described "good witch" who once offered to raise money for Armageddon by appearing in porn films."

Yikes.

Not Bad, Boys

I know I've mentioned on this blog that I really, really, really dislike the NBA. Basketball isn't my favorite sport in the first place, and teams like the L.A. Lakers have pretty much ruined the pro game.

Despite my aversion to the NBA, I've thoroughly enjoyed the last week. The Pistons played real basketball, with real defense and teamwork and stuff. And as the old cliche goes, "Defense Wins Championships." Detroit stunned the Lakers tonight to win the title.

I should probably mention that back in the Pistons glory days, I worked at the Palace of Auburn Hills. In two years as an "Arena Hostess," I never saw the Pistons lose a game. Not bad, huh? The only poopy thing was that in 1989 and 1990, the Pistons won both of their championships on the road, so I wasn't there to seem them hoist the trophy.

As an addendum, Kobe Bryant's credibility is fading fast. Two nights ago, he guaranteed victory for Tuesday night's game. Oops. Think this will hurt his testimony?

What I did Over Summer Vacation

Over the last nine days, Cory and I:
1) Watched Smarty Jones blow the Triple Crown from an Airport lounge in Flint, Michigan.
2) Watched the Pistons beat the Lakers not once, but three times. No, we weren't there. We had to watch it on TV like the rest of you.
3) Further secured my one-way ticket to a burning inferno by purchasing a glow-in-the-dark figurine of St. Claire (patron Saint of Television).
4) Bought a kick-ass Detroit Lions zip-up Sweatshirt for only $9.00.
5) Had one really fun day at Soak City waterpark, and one really crummy day at Cedar Point (formerly my favorite place on the planet... now I'm not so sure).
6) Saw a hysterical movie (and I'm pretty sure 95% of the people I know wouldn't "get it.")
7) Caught up with two high school friends and a dozen or so college friends... and still didn't manage to meet up with everyone (Sorry, Sue! Next time I'm in town, let's hit Cheli's Chili Bar-- I'll buy you a Labatt).
8) Spent way too much time around children. Don't get me wrong-- everyone's kids were great-- there were just way too many of them.
9) Went to Comerica Park (or as Sue calls it, the Devil's Ballpark... if you've ever been to a game at Tiger Stadium, I'm sure you understand), and took in a Tigers Game with Jan and Steve (and the Tigers even Won!)
10) Ate dinner here (Crummy), Drank Beer here (packed to the gills), Had a banquet here (One of my favorite places in the world), had lunch here (Cool, because we're pretty sure that this guy is one of the owners), and also had lunch here (Cool, because we have a hilarious picture of my high school friend Melissa grabbing the crotch of the wooden pirate in front of the restaurant).
11) Spent somewhere in the vicinity of $700. That's right. $700. Who says visiting family is cheaper than a real vacation?

Latchkey Cat

Cory and I got back to our apartment a little before noon on Monday. That means that poor Zoe was alone for nearly nine whole days. Poor little girl. Our friend Nat stopped by to check on her food and water while we were gone, but for the most part, she was all alone.

Some cats hold a grudge when their people leave them alone. Not Zoe. Once we got home, she was following us everywhere we went.

When we got back from the airport, Cory only had about 45 minutes to get a little rest, take a shower, and head in to work. After he left, I thought I could catch a quick nap before I had to work (we had to be up at 4:15 in the morning to catch our flight, so we didn't get much sleep). As soon as Cory was out the door and I shut out the light, Zoe started wandering around, meowing loudly. I think she was afraid we'd deserted her again. When I called her name, she ran out to the bedroom to join me for a little catnap.

When I woke back up an hour later, I hopped in the shower. Just minutes later, I could hear her meowing again. I called to her from the shower, and when I got out, she was sitting in the doorway to the bathroom, making sure I hadn't left her. I felt like a horrible mommy when I had to leave her to go to work.

When we got home tonight, we had to make it up to her. So she got to have a little catnip party in the living room. Right now, she's passed out in the middle of the living room floor, all tuckered out in a drug-induced haze.

Georgia On My Mind

Am I the only person on the planet who finds the death of Ray Charles to be more tragic than the Death of former President Reagan?

Just wondering.

Where in the World...

Is Carmen San Diego?
Nope... Where in the World is the Sportslady?

In the last seven days, I've been to Atlanta (twice), Newnan (twice) and now, Michigan.

The trips to Newnan were for the Georgia state baseball tournament. On Memorial Day, Cory and I headed up to Northgate high school to see the Vikings beat up on our Hardaway Hawks in the state Semifinals. Then, Friday, back up to Newnan to see those same Nortgate Vikings get pummelled by the C-Town High School Blue Devils. Seriously. They made Northgate just look silly (11-0 and 9-1 in the best-of-three series).

The next day, Cory and I were headed up 1-85 for the Atlanta Airport, for our flight to lovely, scenic Michigan. And here we are in the Great Lakes State.

Nothing too exciting so far. I bought a new swimsuit (my first in over a decade that I plan on actually wearing in public). I took my parents out for a "Happy Anniversary/Thanks for Putting up with Us" dinner tonight. That about covers it.

The swimsuit is cute. Dinner, on the other hand, was kind of crappy. We went to the Big Buck Brewery, a former favorite of mine... it was empty, the menu was completely different, and the service was mediocre. Apparently, the ol' Big Buck's gone downhill since the last time I was in town. You can't go home again, I guess.

I Should Be An Agent

Just what I needed.
Weeks after expressing my jealousy over Erin Andrews' career, I checked my blog stats. Twenty-one (count 'em!) people have stumbled across my blog while searching for Erin Andrews' name (Or using complex search strings like "Erin Andrews Hot").

Did I really need to give the woman more publicity?

Oh well, at least it proves that a few people out there are watching hockey on ABC. Not many, but a few.

Pomp And Circumstance

Does anyone else think we're getting a little too uptight when it comes to Graduations? Suddenly, nobody's allowed to cheer at graduation ceremonies. What's the point of going?

A couple of my favorite graduation fiascos from this year:
The 86-year-old grandmother threatened with arrest for cheering.
and The kid who didn't get his diploma after doing a backflip.

In a related story, remember Baby Jessica, the toddler who fell down the well back in 1987? She graduated from high school this week.

Wonder if anyone cheered for her.

Howdy, Strangers

Wow. It's been a while since I posted anything to the good ole blog. Hope everyone had a nice holiday weekend. I did... and I didn't.

It started well enough. Dave and I flip-flopped some of our usual days off, so I could have Saturday off. My Central Michigan University pal Mike was in Atlanta for the weekend, visiting from NYC.

Cory and I headed up to Atlanta Saturday morning and hit The Vortex for lunch. Check out their website-- there's some pretty funny stuff on it.

We headed out to Fernbank (The Atlanta natural history museum), which looks pretty cool. It really isn't, though. They ought to call it "the museum of dead, stuffed things."

After a quick nap at the hotel (give me a break- I had to get up early!), it was time for dinner. We met Mike and some of his other friends at Loca Luna in Midtown Atlanta. If you haven't been there, I strongly recommend it. A very cool place.

Cory and Mike haven't ever met each other, but because of the internet, they've spoken via email and weblog dozens of times. Two years later, they finally met in person. I also met some of Mike's old co-workers. Mike was a little bummed that the turnout wasn't so great. I suspect that since it was a holiday weekend, a lot of his Atlanta friends were elsewhere enjoying three days off.

Anyway, that was the cool part of the weekend. Sunday, we had to get back to Columbus so I could anchor the 6pm show. I got to work around 2:30, put my show together. And waited. And waited. And waited.

Because of rain at the Indy 500, the race (which aired on our station) ended four hours late. The 6pm newscast never happened. Glad we rushed back.

Even better (and I say that with sarcasm), our 10pm Fox newscast started late, thanks to delays in the NASCAR race that night, which aired on our Fox Affiliate. Somebody at the station had the bright idea to cut out of the NASCAR coverage early so that we could get our news on the air. The gearheads were not happy. A half-dozen or so pissed-off NASCAR fans called the station to complain, and (lucky me), some bonehead transferred all of the pissed-off phone calls to my desk. As if I have some control over programming decisions. So I got to deal with those calls while I was trying to prepare for my show. Fun, huh?

Memorial Day was also a hoot. I needed to be in Newnan, Georgia (about 1:15 north of here) to shoot a noon baseball game. Hardaway High School was playing in the State Semifinals. Plenty of time to shoot the first game of the series, drive back to Columbus, take a quick shower, rush to the station, put together my show, and anchor the 6pm sports. Cory was going to come with me for the company, and to see some baseball.

Except it was raining.

We didn't even find out for sure that they would be playing until we were already on the road. So the Noon game became a 2pm game. So I didn't get back from Columbus until 5pm... not nearly enough time to take a quick shower, rush to the station, put together my show, and anchor the 6pm sports. The best-laid plans, right?

Somehow, I did it anyway. I ran in the door at work at 5:45. It didn't hurt that I'd stayed late to write most of my show the night before just in case.

More cruddy things happened on Monday besides that (like arranging for the station to buy a satellite window so we could get highlights another Semifinal game in Augusta, only to find out that our master control operator couldn't figure out how to access the satellite feed).

But I digress.

I hope all of you had a nice holiday weekend... and thanks for listening to me bitch yet again.