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Sunday, March 06, 2005

Marking My Territory

This is getting ridiculous.

In the ladies' room at work, I have a makeup case, a hairbrush, some body powder, body spray, and a bottle of cheap hairspray, among other items.

At least, I had those items. Over the course of a year, I watched my body spray (which I used about six times in that year) slowly get depleted. I caught a few co-workers using it on occasion... but at the time, my thought was that I'd rather have a few people using my cheap Suave-brand body spray than have stinky co-workers.

About once every six weeks or so, I have to go out and buy a new bottle of hairspray. And while my friends can attest to the fact that I do use a lot of spritz, I only anchor three days a week. That means I only spray my hair three days a week. I spray on Saturdays, Sundays, and Mondays... and yet, when I come in the following Saturday, there's always substantially less hairspray in my bottle.

Evaporation? I think not.

I don't know if it's because I use cheap hairspray that my co-workers will think I won't care if they use it. And I understand that sometimes we all have hair emergencies, when we need to use hairspray, even if it means "borrowing" someone else's. In fact, today, I had to "borrow" someone else's hairspray, after I discovered that my bottle, which had been near-empty last week, had been depleted and kindly thrown out by the person who had used it up.

Oh, and don't even get me started on the many shades and textures of hair that I find in my brush on a weekly basis. Yuck.

So what do I do? Revert to 18-year-old college freshman roommate tactics and write my name on everything that's mine, with the words "Do Not Use" emblazoned across them in permanent marker? Deal with it and buy enough hairspray for all of my co-workers to have their own bottle? Stop wearing makeup, and fixing my hair as a form of silent protest?

Or should I just urinate on everything that's mine?

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