EEEW, Eeew, eeew!!!
(This post is rated "R" for adult situations)

I just had, quite possibly, one of the most disturbing things happen to me in my entire life.

First, a little backstory. We live in a townhouse, and we share a roof and half of a shed/laundry room with one other townhouse. Our attic is a shared space, but there's a divider made of wood and chickenwire between our space and theirs. Our shed (attached to our patio) is seperated by a brick wall between our half and theirs. The wall is about 7 feet high, but there's a small gap (about 4") between the top of the wall and the ceiling of the shed. The ceiling is an exposed-beam ceiling, so the gap actually looks like a little cubby-hole. You wouldn't even know the gap was there, except for the fact that you can hear into the other side. So if they're in their shed, and we're in our shed, we can hear them, but there's no possible way to be able to see them. I should add that we've never exchanged more than a "hello" with these neighbors.

(One quick, funny, story... one day, Cory was doing the laundry out in the shed and he could hear someone in the other half of the shed, and could also hear what sounded like a goat. I asked him, "what did the goat sound like?" and he tried to replicate the sound for me. After a moment, I asked, "Ummm, do you think it might have been their baby???")

Ok, so back to what just happened. In our storage/laundry shed, I have a laundry sorter, which is essentially three tall baskets. Today, I went out there to do laundry. I'd finished a load, was about to sort some more laundry, and I see something sitting in the bottom of the laundry sorter. It looks kind of like a purse.

That's weird, I thought... but since we use that room for storage, I'm thinking to myself, maybe it's some crap of Cory's that his mom shoved in an old purse just to keep it all together. You know, maybe it's some golf tees and golf balls and old spikes or something.

So, I look inside. There's a silky scarf inside. So now, I'm intrigued. What the hell is this thing? Then I realize that the scarf is wrapped around a large pink dildo.

"Holy Sh*t!" I shouted, now completely freaked out by the entire experience (and in my opinion, understandably so). How the hell did this thing get in my laundry basket?

I ponder the possibilities:

1. It's Cory's. I choose not to believe that.
2. I'm an amnesiac sex addict who can't remember where she hid her vibrator.
3. One of us left the laundry room unlocked one night, and some stranger, needing a place to hide her "friend," just happens to wander onto our fenced-in patio, just happens to open the door to our shed, and just happens to decide to hide it in my laundry basket. Pretty unlikely.

Then, I look up. The gap in the wall is directly above the sorting basket. I'm thinking that our neighbor wanted to hide her personal item, thought she was sticking it into a cubby-hole, and inadvertantly dropped it right into our half of the shed, right into my laundry sorter.

So, what did I do? Walk over to my neighbor's apartment, ring the doorbell, and ask if she's lost anything? Nope. Throw it in the dumpster and pretend the whole disgusting ordeal never happened? No way.

Shove it right back through the cubbyhole until I heard the satisfying "thump" of the bag-o-nasty hitting the floor in their shed?

You betcha.

Then I washed my hands. Repeatedly.